文/蓮生活佛 盧勝彥
我早已隱居閉關「葉子湖」多年,不聞世事久矣!對世間諸事,早已脫節,可以說,不想聞,不想問,不想理。
但,每回禪定三昧神行,就出現諸多境界,令我在神行中,也在度眾生,說是退隱,其實不像退隱,說是不退隱,明明是已經退隱了,真的退隱了。
這真的難言。
算是對眾生太有情了。眾生不捨我,我不捨眾生。
在我色身,真是隱了。但恆常的心,懷念著聖弟子的情誼,這些情誼怎能忘?
眾生是可敬的,他們伴過我最快樂的時光,我自己太卑微了,我能成就一切,全是他們的賜予。他們有煩惱,而我自己清涼自在,我當然要消除他們的煩惱,能置之腦後而不理嗎?
當然我明白,弟子中也有邪惡的,是非不明的,退了初心的,但,他們一樣被罪苦所迫,我更需要去關懷。更甚的是嫉恨我的,非理辱罵譭謗我的,加害我的,我不能忘記我的誓言,更要去度化他們。
在昔日,我曾寄望某人出來度眾生,深心寄予厚望,想不到反被設計加害,這是逆加持,使我更成就為大善知識,我更須感激他們,感恩他們。
總之,不管是順境、逆境,全是助我精進成道者,我願意貢獻我的生命,眾生有諸苦難,我是非救不可。
在禪定中我有情。
在三昧中我有義。
在神行中我有法。
我看一切有情眾生,如同父母兄弟姐妹一樣的親,視之如同「如意寶」,願日吉祥,夜吉祥,時時刻刻皆吉祥。但願我在神行中,能成就他們的究竟利樂。
我是退隱了。
但心永不退隱。
所以是,退隱非退隱是退隱。
大家隨我修「三昧」,認知世間如幻夢,不去執著而離縛,解脫成就達「淨土」。
A Retreat is Not a Retreat Hence it is Called a Retreat
Written by Living Buddha Lian-sheng, Sheng-yen Lu
Translated by Cheng Yew Chung
Edited and Proofread by Jason Yu
I have spent many years in retreat at Leaf Lake, unconcerned with the affairs of the world. I have long separated myself from the events in the world, for I am not interested in listening to, asking about, or thinking about what is happening.
However, every time I enter samadhi, I spiritually travel to different places and encounter many situations, leading to the deliverance of sentient beings.
While I am in retreat, it doesn’t quite seem like I am in retreat. Yet I cannot say that I am not in retreat, because I truly am in retreat. It is difficult to explain.
I am truly committed to sentient beings. Sentient beings cannot bear to leave me, and I do not want to forsake them.
It is true that I am physically in retreat. However, my eternal heart reminisces of the friendship with my holy disciples. How can I forget them?
Sentient beings are indeed respectable, for they have accompanied me through my happiest days. I feel I am really nothing, for all my accomplishments in life have come from gifts of sentient beings. When sentient beings are caught in their afflictions, and I remain unhindered in a state of purity, I must remove their afflictions. How can I ignore them?
Of course I know that among my disciples are those who are evil, deluded, and those who have lost their initial faith. Yet they are all troubled by their karmic transgressions, and I must offer them even more care. Topping the list are those who hate me out of jealousy, slander me without reason, and those who want to harm me. Yet I cannot forget my vows and must seek to deliver them.
Once I had great expectations on certain individuals to help me deliver sentient beings, placing great hopes upon them; yet they have turned around to frame and harm me. It was in a way a blessing in disguise, for the experience made me a greater teacher. I must therefore thank them, and be grateful.
Overall, regardless of whether the situation was good or bad, they fuel my effort to attaining Oneness. Therefore I am willing to devote all of my life to service, and whenever sentient beings are in trouble, I must do everything possible to help them.
In meditation I am humane.
In samadhi I remain grateful.
In spiritual travel I am resourceful.
In my eyes, all sentient beings are as close to me as my own parents, brothers and sisters. I see them as the wish-fulfilling jewel, and may their days be auspicious, may their nights be auspicious, and may they be auspicious at all times. I hope that I will be able to help them attain their blessings and joys in my spiritual travels.
I may be in retreat, but my heart is never in retreat. Hence, a retreat is not a retreat, and thus it is called a retreat.
I invite you to practice entering into samadhi, and recognize the fact that this world is but a dream, and thus be liberated from all bondage through non-attachment, where we shall reach the Pure Land with our attainment of liberation.